All tagged respect

I Speak for Myself: Why Men Need to Respect Women's "No"

Summer is here, and short skirts, tank tops, and sundresses are back in fashion. For most heterosexual men, this is a thing to celebrate. Most women are a bit more undecided about their sentiments toward ‘sundress weather’. You see, as the temperatures and hemlines rise, so do cat calls, lewd looks and the occurrences of “let me talk to you for a minute.” As a woman, I’ve come to expect this, and have made a sort of peace with it. What I’ve struggled to do is perfect my method of polite rejection. I’ve written about this before, and I must say, my method has not much improved. Being approached by men can be flattering, but more often than not, it’s frustrating because women are left to figure out how to say “no”, and have that “no” be heard and respected.

 

The standard response is “I have a boyfriend.” It feels safe and foolproof, or at least it used to, until dudes got wise and started asking why they couldn’t befriend you. But aside from its effectiveness, or lack thereof, I stumbled across another reason why women should stop using their boyfriends, real or imaginary, as a means of rejecting men who approach them

A Word or Two In Defense of Black Women

I don’t know when it happened, but someone declared it open season on black women and shots are being fired with extreme prejudice. I can’t tell you the last day I went without reading or hearing some pathetically unfunny joke about black women, but I can tell you this – I’m sick of it. I am tired of Black women being the butt of jokes that belittle, demean and devalue us. It upsets me most because a lot of those jokes are being made by Black men who, if no one else, should understand the value of Black women. So “brothers,” this is my open letter to you.

 

Before writing this piece, I was tempted to say that I don`t care about Black men who hate Black women, simply because I feel that if you can`t appreciate me for what I am, beyond what stereotypes or appearances suggest, it’s really your loss. But in the case of the degradation of Black women, this is too widespread to ignore and I feel obligated to care.